An Anti-Climate Change Lobbyist on the News at 5
Author: Ife John-Idiagbonya
Caption: Many anti-climate change lobbyists brand themselves as experts in the field of climate change (despite having little to no background on it) while casting doubt onto scientists (that have spent years of their lives studying and researching the climate). These lobbyists use the lack of knowledge that people have about science to cast doubt on the accuracy of research done about climate change. They use various tactics and phrasing to confuse the public and to make scientists look like villains. Each argument may make some sense individually, but as they come together they begin to contradict each other and turn into an almost incoherent mess. This poem is a reflection of that.
Tags: Doubt as a Tool
Submission:
If you know, you know.
“What do you know?
They could be lying to you
They are lying to you.
A conspiracy
Of what?
They don’t want you to know
I also don’t know, but
I know more than you
I took two classes
in environmental science
in my four years of college
so I’m as good as any expert.
But you?
You don’t know anything so
I’ll tell you
It’s all fake!
A hoax!
A quack theory.
But yea,
it’s all a big conspiracy.
And you know,
there’s not even a consensus
among scientists
whether climate change is real.
A few say one thing
Some say another
Who knows what’s the truth?
But let me tell you
the truth:
Most scientists don’t believe
that climate change is real.
I know, I know.
It’s crazy. But
there was this one petition
back in ’97
Over 31,000 signatures
all saying the science didn’t prove
that climate change was real.
One of them was a real famous scientist
Charles Dickens?
Charles Darwin?
One of the two.
But either way, a real smart guy
Really knows his stuff.
But all these scientists
can’t even agree
on whether or not climate change is real.
But yea,
They’re all working together
in a conspiracy
to overthrow democracy.
And those scientists?
They’re all dumb.
They don’t know what they’re talking about.
But they’re so clever.
They’re manipulating the public to
do their evil bidding.
They want to take over the world, and
turn everyone
into communists
and socialists
and fascists.
They’re all so calculating
They’ve got a big plan.
But yea,
They’re all too dumb to actually understand
how the planet works.
You know
you can trust me.
I learned some science
but I don’t know the science,
cause I’m not a
democracy-hating,
climate change-believing,
lying little
scientist,
but I know the truth.
But you don’t know
and they don’t know
so you should take my word for it.”
